Disclaimer: I live in Texas where these are our seasons: 1) almost summer, 2) hotter than H-E-double-hockey-sticks, 3) still summer, and 4) a little cooler than summer. Keep your snowballs to yourself. They would just melt before they hit me anyway.
Yes, I’m sad to say goodbye to Old Man Winter. Spring is threatening everywhere with blooming daffodils, budding azaleas, and people wearing flipflops and shorts in 50-degree weather. Why am I sad? Let me count the ways.
1. Snow. I’m still waiting! We haven’t even had a good ice storm this winter! I’ve got grandchildren who’ve never even seen snowmen in person. A few years ago we had snow in March. It’s getting pretty far into March now, though, and no weather person has mentioned any ice storms coming in the near future.
2. Allergies. Here, allergy season goes into high gear in the spring. The weather turns nice, the flowers start blooming, then, just as you start thinking about doing some yard work, that thick yellow stuff called pollen coats everything from vehicles to cows and sends you running back into the house for Kleenex and Chlorpheniramine. Try sneezing and saying that at the same time.
3. Boots. I’ve managed to accumulate several pairs of boots over the years and I really like to wear them. My toes and roadmaps of veins hide pretty well in boots. I would even wear them in the summer if they also didn’t serve as ovens in hot weather. Someone should invent tiny air conditioners for shoes.
4. Winter clothes. So much more attractive on older, heavier bodies than skimpy summer styles. Who wants to see upper arms and legs over 50? That’s why shrugs and capri pants were invented, people. But sometimes it gets so hot you just gotta. I know! I’m right there with you! Forget about swimsuits. Unless you have to take grandkids. Then what do you do? You resort to suits with skirts and baggy coverups and hope you don’t have to get in the water, or at least deeper than your ankles.
5. Blazing fires. Not a good thing in summertime when the air already feels like you’re standing near a fire. Great in the winter. Who doesn’t love a roaring fire in the fireplace or firepit? You get to wrap up in a blanket and sip on a warm beverage. Nothing better. In the summer just stare at the sun or its reflection on car windshields. But not directly, of course.
That’s about it. I’ll have to paint my toenails, break out the sandals and capri pants, put the boots and sweaters in storage, and resign myself to another six months of scorching heat. That’s all right, I suppose. I’ll try to squeeze in some yard work before the sun burns everything up. Now where did I put the Flonase and tissue? Achoo!
How do you feel about winter?